I'm not sure about this. I'm about $20,000 in - so I feel like I can't quit. It's not like I'm failing ... or doing poorly. I've been rocking all my classes, labs and clinics. In fact, this is the best I have been doing in any school - ever!
I was sitting in clinic today and looking up over the half walls at the dental lights and the ceiling and I felt as though I was losing myself. This really isn't me. Why did I chose this? Because I need a real career. But I so need to be creative, I feel like I'm dying a little inside.
Since starting school, I haven't had time for any of my instruments or any writing. I feel absolutely trapped here because of the amount of money. And there are still 2.5 years to go. I'll finish this semester. Take Christmas Break to relax and then come back and finish up the year. Maybe after the summer, I'll want to come back a second year. It's certainly been an adjustment from having a full time career and travelling all the time to being stuck here and a student again. And maybe that's all these feelings are. I have to admit they have gotten better since September. September was an emotional disaster! I am so thankful for $3/month unlimited calling on Skype. It was the only thing that saved me.
